Every Friday
Sponsored by hate from Jira
Happy Friday, crew. Relay is officially back in the office this week (minus Macke because him and Benni are still deep in aperitivo land), digging out of our Outlook inboxes. We’re praying your workweek was lighter than ours.
The Nashville crew is bracing for the Saturday morning gauntlet — logging miles to run off the mountains of focaccia and getting Jack tuned up for his backyard ultra later this month.
Hit play and let’s get this weekend rolling.
Every single tech company in the world is going to be paid based on value creation. Maybe that's not completely true today, but it will be true tomorrow. The future is going to be: you create X value, I pay you Y. Larger companies struggle to move from 'I get paid because you can't get rid of me' to 'I get paid because you don't want to get rid of me.
— Alex Karp
I don't mean to look scary, it's just kind of what I have to work with. Maybe that's why my tattoos are literally the first thing people Google about me.
— John Fetterman
Top of Mind
Google avoids break-up but must share data with rivals (BBC)
Google will not have to sell its Chrome web browser but must share information with competitors, a US federal judge has ordered.
This week was a big win for Google, despite having to potentially pay this speeding ticket as part of the ruling. While Chrome has a significant share of the browser market, somewhere between sixty to seventy percent, it’s no accident the product is where it is. It’s the best product. Everyone uses it because it is the best product. DHH put it into perspective in his recent blog post:
“We want an 800-pound gorilla in the web's corner! Because Apple would love nothing better (despite the admirable work to keep up with Chrome by Team Safari) to see the web's capacity as an application platform diminished. As would every other owner of a proprietary application platform. Microsoft fought the web tooth and nail back in the 90s because they knew that a free, open application platform would undermine lock-in — and it did!”
Two cheers for a free and open web.
Great time to sell your company if your name starts with “The”
The Free Press for 200
The Browser Company for 600
It appears 610 million is the going rate for pre-product, pre-revenue companies these days. It is tough to say what the core driver of the sale was. Does Atlassian want to get into the browser game? Is the world class design/product team at The Browser Company worth $610m? Either way, the group chat is absolutely a house divided on the matter.
Ponzi scheme or masterclass, congrats and go fuck yourself to Josh, The Browser Company team, and venture capitalist for the ~6x on invested capital. We can’t wait to someday open Jira on Dia, and use the native AI functionality to autogenerate user-stories based on our browsing history. In sincerity, it’s somewhat of a shame when buyouts like this happen. The creative flame which made their products perfect will likely be extinguished by the giant acquirer. Best wishes to Josh and the team, hopefully they enjoy their vest-out period in Australia.
ICYMI: Happy Hour Edition
Most of our readers could care less about The Browser Company acquisition, but if you’re curious about how Josh Miller cashed out at $610 Million, this is by far the best take avail.
Andrea Hernández is our head director of vibes in all things niche consumer snacks. We love you Snaxshot.
I (Jack) hope they prove me wrong for once. Maybe Siri’s time has finally come: Apple Plans AI-Powered Web Search Tool for Siri to Rival OpenAI, Perplexity
Best of Substack this Week
GDP: We Really Don’t Know How Good We Have It - Asterisk Magazine
Performative Grind Culture and the "9-9-6" - Young Money by Jack Raines
You've Got Mail: Hotel Routines, Fall Cocktails, and Brand Building - Will deFries
It’s Not That Deep, Randy
Thanks for reading—or for mega scrolling all the way down here.
The internet is an overwhelming mess of headlines, ads, and mid takes from the worst people you know. Big Tech owns our attention spans. Everything is content. Nothing makes sense.
We’re not here to “fix discourse” or “build a better internet.” Relay is just our attempt to riff on what we’re already talking about at happy hour without feeling like we’ve been hit by a content truck. Some analysis, some memes, call it a day.
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